In what may prove to be the single largest real estate transaction in modern history, the United States has traded the city of Detroit and $27 billion for the city of Montreal and a small mountain range to be named later. Goat Soup Radio's White House correspondent, Belinda Hollandaise, was the first to break the news. "It's a stunner, Steve. I can't reveal my sauce but word is Canada gets Ford, GM and Chrysler. We get the Montreal Canadiens hockey team and a lot of french bread. What was the president thinking? In this reporters opinion, Canada should have thrown in Winnipeg. No questions asked."
Later that day, President Obama met the press. "Michele and I look at it quite differently than Ms. Hollandaise. Truthfully, we were always eyeing Montreal. Tasty tap water, lots of parking and all those people speaking French. Not that I have anything against New Orleans. But how much chicken gumbo can one person eat? And another thing, when I pass into the next world I sure don't want a bunch of strangers parading down the street in back of my coffin dancing like they've got ants in their pants."
Controversy was unbound. Goat Soup Radio's international correspondent, Claudia Fort Laudia spoke to a gendarme or whatever they call the police in Montreal and he had this to say, " It took me 5 years to figure out how to say 'you have the right to remain silent' in French. Now I have to learn it in English?"
Of course, people weren't pleased in Detroit, either. Chicken King proprietor Gaston Notsag had this comment."Montreal and 27 big ones for Detroit? And you want us to change all of our license plates right before Memorial Day? You are crazy!"
Finally, GSRadio spoke to Harvey Little of Hollywood, California, 'real estate agent to the stars' and the broker in this historic mega deal. "I always like everyone to come away with something. In this case, the US gets a fantastic town with plenty of views and Canada gets a nice fixer upper with enough cash to hire every contractor on Angie's List."
Looking or more...? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3xwk0mTWqs