Friday, April 5, 2013


GSRadio Archive
Yorba Linda. California. 3:45 PM. It appears to be axiomatic in American politics that you can never count Richard Nixon out. In a surprise move that stunned even his closest supporters, former President of the United States, Richard Milhous Nixon, 100 this year, has once again stepped into the limelight to claim his position in Camelot.
Standing in front of the steps of the Nixon library in Yorba Linda, California, a formerly disgraced ex-president gave a rousing, moving speech explaining his reasons for being so much out of the spotlight these many years and why he has now decided to throw his hat into the political ring.

  "I've been living the quiet life of a retired family man. Playing with my many grandchildren, reading them stories of brave knights and heroic journeys. And when my great grand son, Te-Te asked me what I did when I was young, well, I told him the truth. And after three hours we both just sat there and cried. And I realized then that there was more of Richard Milhous Nixon to offer. It was time to bring Pat back to the White House and time to bring order and integrity back to America."

  Immediately following Nixon's remarks the White House issued the following statement: "President Obama has always applauded Americans for getting into the political process and he wishes the former president, although quite dead, all the best."

It may not, however, be all peaches and cream for Mr. Nixon. GSR's own legal scholar, Diana Singer, who has extensively studied dead ex-presidents who wish to run for office had this to say:"  First, if he does win he'd have to go out and find every single Nixon postage stamp that was ever issued, licked or not, and return it to the post office. And second, he will definitely have to pull votes across party lines; the blue states, the red states and of course, the dead states."

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