Saturday, April 6, 2013


courtesy: Gino's Landscaping
Beijing, China. 8:30 pm.
The Communist Party of China, the ruling body over China's 1.3 billion inhabitants,  has apparently taken a cold hard look at what they've accomplished since the beginning of the "modernization" era beginning the 1980's under Cho Zee Tung. First as rumors, then a tidal wave of emails, faxes and twitters, it is now official that the government of China intends to stop everything that they are doing and begin again.

The official announcement  reads in part: "...we've made many mistakes and want another go at it. Too much pollution, 16,500 cities each with a population of over 10 million residents and far too many gymnasts. We therefore pledge ourselves to begin again, A clean break from the order has gone out to People's Machine Factory Number 52 for 1,344,458,788 shovels. One for each and every Chinese man, woman and child in our great country.

                         China hopes to shovel their way out of it.
 With shovel in hand we will all be transported to the Chinese border. Standing 7.4 meters apart from each other we will completely surround Mother China. All of us will begin to dig beginning on "san" (that's three in Chinese for those of you who took Spanish in high school) turning over everything into the soil as we all move to the center of the country.Crops, buildings, ships, stadiums will all have to be taken down and turned over into the soil. Once our mission is done we will have our delicious box lunch, wipe the sweat from our brow and then we begin again."
Quickly from the United Nations came this response : "The United Nation's High Commissioner on Global Development and Getting More Sprinkle Cheese onto the Spaghetti in the UN Employee's Cafeteria (UNHCGDGMSCSUNEC)is very much against such a move. A critical shovel shortage at this time throughout the third world  would be devastating. We implore the Chinese government to think rationally about this and consider using per diem workers only."

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